Back to Logging Food


In the past, I have tried  writing down what I plan on eating every morning, logging what I ate every night, and Weight Watchers. I had success in doing so, to varying degrees. But I was tired of always logging. I committed myself to just eating well, and trusting that I knew my limitations and how to be realistic. I did well with this for a while, but as you’ve seen here, I have pretty much plateau’d (plateaued?!). So, it’s time to switch things up. I’m still killing it at CrossFit, so obvs that’s not the problem. Must be the intake. 


I can admit, I have been on the sloppy side with my food. The summer will do that as we all know. More drinking, more going out, more ”treat yo’ selfs”. But it’s almost Labour Day, and time to get down to business. Monday I started using the App, My Fitness Pal (as a recommendation from my friend Katie). The way it works is you enter your height, weight, lifestyle, your goal weight and how much you want to lose per week. You log your food and exercise each day (it does not recognize CrossFit, so I just leave out the workouts most of the time). It’s so easy to do, and it’s been great so far. I am so conscious of what I’m eating. I have eaten less calories than my goal each day. I feel hungry, but that’s good. I am nourishing my body with healthy food. 


I can’t wait to see how this all unfolds. I’m feeling really good about it so far. It’s just important, that on days that aren’t so good (and of course there will be some!) I continue to be honest and log what I’ve done. The scale never lies. There is no point in not being  honest about our intake. 


I highly suggest for anyone to try this app! You will not be disappointed… and it’s free! 



Road to being an ”Athlete”. CrossFit is for everyone.

It’s been a little while since I’ve posted about CrossFit, don’t worry! I’m still going at least 4 times a week. I’m becoming stronger, more confident, and better at it every day. I fucking love this shit. 

This morning, I came across this article, and it obviously just described my CrossFit experience so far. I’ve been reading a lot of articles about CrossFit, I follow all the athletes on Instagram, it’s been an increasingly bigger interest of mine. However, since it really is a sport that had the intention of training athletes into superior athletes, there hasn’t been all that much written (at least to my knowledge) about the very novice athletes, about the people who have been doing CrossFit and have a lot of weight to lose. 


I was so scared to walk into that gym the first time, and probably never would have had it not been for my family (read previous CrossFit post for more details, we won’t go through all that again). I have been going a lot since, I’m getting the movements down, and I am of course improving in every way. However, what this article describes, about those of us who have that much more weight to lose (rather than those who just need to get in shape, or to improve their athleticism) is that it’s fucking hard. Yes, it’s hard for everyone, that’s the whole point! But I have more restrictions than someone who, let’s say weighs 120 lbs. I rarely let it get in my way though. I never weasel out of any WOD. I scale everything that I have to, and I do everything that’s on the board. 


I get frustrated though. I’m frustrated that I can’t freaking hang from the rig for more than 5 seconds. (I honestly thought I could do more, as my knee raises are getting pretty good- but a WOD this week taught me that I cannot). I know I’m strong, I just did a 3 Rep Max Deadlift of 195 lbs, which I could probably do more. But hang from the rig for 10 seconds? Nope, not there yet, and that’s super irritating for me. 


I agree with what this writer says, everyone in CrossFit says not to worry about the weight, that it will come off. And it is. But the reality is, I probably won’t be able to do what everyone else does until I get down there in weight. I need to also really focus on my weight loss as well as my CrossFit training. Because I want to do, not only what everyone else does, but I want to do it better. I don’t want people to have to wait for me when we are running the square run, I want to wait for others, and encourage them. I can train as much as I want, get as strong as I want, but until I’m at my goal weight, CrossFit will always be tough, and some things (I’m looking at you pull-up, and handstand push-up) will be near impossible. 


Don’t misunderstand, none of this is negative. I love CrossFit, I don’t feel well when I don’t go. I feel alive and strong when I leave the WOD. And I would absolutely suggest to anyone who is trying to lose weight, to get themselves to a box and join in this amazing community. Only good things come of CrossFit. But, we need to be honest with ourselves, we might not be able to do what everyone can! And that’s totally fine! Someone with a shoulder injury can’t do a perfect snatch, just like how I can’t get low enough in my squats (seriously, the bane of my existence- I’m having a party when I can break parallel). We are all different, I’m just wearing a weighted vest for now. But its getting lighter every week, and soon- that vest is coming off, and I am scared for the other CrossFitters. If I’m this good at this weight, how much ass am I going to kick at my goal weight?!



Other than my health and weight, I’ve been trying to work on a lot of things. I’ve spoken before about how fearful and anxious I always am (I’m just full of interesting facets aren’t I?). There’s a long story about a Psoas (so-assssss!!!) muscle in here, but that’s for another post. Seriously, it’s so long, you don’t want to hear it now! However, working on that muscle led me to a lot of research, and that research led me to some chakra research (I know, super new-age) and then led me ultimately to mindfulness. Mindful is something that I so rarely am. I have figured out that my anxiety is based on my projections of the future, as opposed to reality. And future is not something we can control, all we can control is what we are doing right here, right now. I started trying to meditate (I’ve done it 3 times now), and it’s amazing. I’m not sitting in a dark pillow den – even though that sounds delightful- surrounded by the waft of incense or anything. But, for about 10 minutes, I lie in my room and clear my mind, focus on my body and my surroundings. Yesterday, a friend introduced me to this app called Headspace (get it, it’s awesome). It’s essentially guided meditation for us new new age people. By new new age, I mean people like myself, who don’t really have any strong religious beliefs. But do believe in something, people who believe in the world and want to be a positive influence. People who want to live happy and healthy lives. It isn’t hoakey or creepy or weird. Just a cool British guy making you focus on a few things. I have to say, meditation is amazing, and I truly believe that everyone in the world needs to get into it. I feel so much better, I can barely explain it. 


I also started reading The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle, and it’s so great. I read a few pages each day, nothing crazy. And I just slowly work on some of the ideas he talks about. Just controlling and silencing our mind. Being present. Not dwelling and stewing on the past. Not anticipating, worrrying and projecting the future. It’s really amazing, I swear in like 4 days how different I feel. I’m still a total crazy person, but I’m less anxious, I’m worrying less about what MIGHT happen, and I’m just accepting things as they are. I feel calm and happy and especially content. These are all good things – obvs. I am just living my life, making good choices, and just trying to be present. I find I’ve been enjoying myself more, because I’m not so worried about the past or future. 


This is probably all sounding like some crazy rambling (also, because I never edit my posts, I just write feverishly and post), but if you have ever wanted to calm yourself, relieve anxiety or just enjoy every moment a little more, I would suggest trying meditation. No one is going to think you’re weird, it’s actually super cool. If you’re a little crazier, grab The Power of Now and read it, I don’t think you’ll regret it. 


I’m just starting to feel great about everything, can’t wait to continue all of this. Life is good. 









I know I’ve spoken about Courage before, it is really something that I’ve been trying to work on. It’s a definite ”interest” of mine these days, ha! if you can really call it that! Maybe it has to do with my penchant for teenage fiction novels with strong female leads (I’m looking at you Hunger Games and Divergent). I recently finished the 3rd book in the Divergent series (Allegiant), and it was great! As these types of books ALWAYS are. Last night as I was reading the end, this paragraph came up, and it really resonated with me. I read it over a few times to really let it sink in. Take the time to read it, because when I talk about bravery and courage, this is the kind that I am talking about. Of course, there are much more brave acts in this world. But it’s the little ones, the every day ones, the ones that often go unnoticed to others. Those acts of bravery are the ones that I am really interested in. It’s what gives someone character. It is perseverance, and the will to be better. Today I choose to be brave. 

I’m Still Here!!!


I didn’t realize how long it had been since I have written a blog entry! Don’t worry, I’m still here, and I’m still working hard at reaching my goal!! I haven’t given up, just apparently haven’t written in the blog. I won’t say I’ve been too busy, because I don’t believe in excuses like that, we can make time for anything! I guess I just haven’t written in my blog.

So, where were we? I’ve done a lot in the past month. Went to a Katy Perry concert (she is seriously awesome, and I totally have a girl crush on her). I saw one of my favorite comedians, Aziz Ansari perform at the Just for Laughs festival and he was, as always HILARIOUS. His tour is called Modern Romance, and I can totally identify with all his funny stories about dating in this modern world. Seriously, how long should I wait before replying to a text? (Rhetorical).

I went to Florida for a week, which felt SO GOOD! It was amazing to be on vacation, to see some of my family there, that I don’t get to see all that often too. We had a ton of fun. I got to shop for new clothes (because nothing really fits me anymore, thanks to the weight loss!!!). It felt so nice to fit into smaller clothes, and to feel absolutely beautiful in them. I’ve started wearing sleeveless shirts (for the first time in FOREVER). My arms aren’t perfect, but they’re getting strong, leaner and they are pretty tanned right now. So fuck it, if I like a top, and it doesn’t have sleeves, I’m not covering my arms up anymore.

I let myself be a little more lenient with my eating while I was away. We had pizza one night, I had desserts etc. However, my body doesn’t respond well to eating a lot of carbs anymore (thanks body!!!). I think what’s most important for me when I let myself (and by that I mean plan to eat something that I wouldn’t normally), is that I don’t get upset with myself about it. I just enjoy it, and move on! All in all, I had a great vacation.

So, to update, because I have still weighed myself, but just haven’t written about it, I have lost more weight (yay!). However, not as much as I would have liked to. But that’s ok. Summer, parties, vacation and all. I’m going to keep pushing, and try to kick it up a notch to finish the summer strong!! I’m going to really stick to my 2 ”cheat” meals a week, eating very clean for the rest of the time.


32 lbs lost!!! 68 to go!! (this is getting good! I would really like to be at 35 lbs lost by the end of the week- let’s work for it!!)

I will be blogging my weight loss every day for an entire year. My goal is to lose 100 lbs.